1) Request that your personal items be shipped to you. No point in doing it face to face. Right? Right.

2) Pretend that getting an email notification of said break up is totally the legit way to go. Dude! It’s totally like breaking up with someone using a Post-It note. Class-y.

3) Act really mature like everything’s okay when in fact you just want to exclaim, “You’re a fucking dick!” as loud as fucking possible.

4) Remove all traces of said person from all social networking sites, cell phones and emails. It’s like ripping off a band-aid. The quicker the better.

5) Blog about it. Duh.